Weird dreams and life reflections
August 24, 2012 14 Comments
Last night I had a very strange dream. I usually don’t dream, because my mind tends to be awake and too busy thinking. I can’t remember the last time I had a dream and by dream I mean a full story or at least a clip of a story. When I do dream there seems to be certain themes that I dream about. The most dominate themes are that I am either being frightened or I am playing a hero saving someone from trouble. Although I am no dream interpreter, I do believe both of these themes are telling about my “being”, whatever that is.
Ever since I can remember I had a deep sense to take care of others, especially those who are less fortunate. I am emotionally moved easily by the experiences of others and I have always loved people who fought for the weak and the vulnerable so it is no surprise I get to play those roles in my dreams.
As for being frightened, I crave safety and comfort. I am no risk taker, especially when the matter concerns my heart. I guard myself safely. I am afraid of all the things, which could go wrong even amidst the sea of happiness in which I swim daily, because there is that voice which whispers my time to drown shall come. I imagine pain and suffering that isn’t even there, because I know it will come. It must come. It always does, doesn’t it? Isn’t that the nature of the universe? To strip away our happiness? I mean, who in this world goes through life unscarred? Whose heart has never been broken? Isn’t it, a matter of sooner or later?
But so what, if it is? So what, if you get your heart broken and you suffer losses? Haven’t you also felt love, joy and won many battles? And if not, isn’t it within you to feel love, to feel joy and to win the important battles in which you fight?
It is all possible and it is all a part of life. The ups and downs are part of our journey. The older I have become, the more I begin to realize to truly live, to truly grow and to truly feel magic, I must be willing to step outside my comfort zone and have the courage to follow my heart. And to not be so overwhelmed with what the future holds and forget the moment in which I have been given. It is easier said than done of course, but it must be done otherwise we live only halfway. We will be too afraid to experience. Too afraid of all the things that could go wrong. We have no control on what the future will bring. All we have is this moment and over this moment we do exercise a great deal of power. It may sound like a cliché, but it was right all along. It is all within you.
As Imam Ali RA is quoted to have said:
“Your sickness is from you – but you do not perceive it
You remedy is within you – but you do not sense it
You presume that you are a small entity – whereas within in you is enfolded the entire universe
You are indeed the evident book, by whose alphabet the hidden becomes manifest,
Therefore you have no need to look beyond yourself; what you seek is within you, if only you reflect.”
And back to my strange dream, which brought forth all these mixed feelings. I was at home and in a room when three peculiar beautiful looking birds visited me. The birds were yellow and green, and of big size for their species. And of course this being a dream, these birds could talk. After smiling and admiring the beauty of these birds, I opened the window to set them free. I told them to fly away and be free. Two of the birds followed my call and flew away. The third stood on the window and looked back me. It said, “I’m not flying away. It is youm al qiyamah.” I laughed and looked at the bird, thinking there is no way this is youm al qiyamah. It’s far too soon and it isn’t supposed to happen in my lifetime. Those were my instant thoughts. Then the bird looked back at the sky and I went closer to the window to also take a look. That is when my heart fell. And I mean really fell. Imagine utter terror.
The hour had come so my first instinct was to make my salah. I was too frightened to meet God without one last prayer and last plea for mercy. My second instinct was to get my parents. Chaos ensued and I am feeling all the emotions of dread. That is where the dream ended.
Youm al qiyamah is the Arabic phrase for the Day of Judgment. The bird in my dream did use those exact words and I relate here the exact dream I had last night. In my opinion dreams are not meant to be taken literally. Of course everyone has their interpretations, but I don’t believe the dream was about youm al qiyamah per se. Currently, I am going through a life changing phase, in which I feel all the emotions one feels in a time of uncertainty and great change so I believe that is where my dream came from. And because I am very connected spiritually to my faith, in times of panic and fear I turn to my two sources of strength, God and my parents, may God always protect them for me.
I also took from the dream, life is short. Even if one is uncertain or simply doesn’t believe in an afterlife, there is no dispute about death and none of us know when our time is coming. We may think we have a long time to go, but we don’t know for sure. Therefore I took it as a reminder to live each day with a sense of urgency. To not be afraid of what I have no control over and to have the courage to make for myself the life I wish to have. That requires risk taking and letting my heart go.
Peace & Love.